Overcoming Your Fears – TRUST
How I learned to enjoy my own company, and love being independent.
I spent my weekend on a glamorous girls trip in Toronto. Not just any trip, but a blogging conference. I spent my first day at She’s Connected, then the next two at Blissdom (I will save the comparison for another post). I knew it would be really fun, but I wasn’t really expecting it to make as much of an impact on me as it did.
My first day, I ran to the lobby to meet the group that was all going to attend the live taping of MARILYN DENIS. Little did I know how much I would love getting to know these women. Julie, Kyla, Tara, and Alisha kept me entertained while walking to, waiting for and watching the show. Julie described it as summer camp, a fitting description for how you feel looking back on this experience.
During the week I spent a lot of time on the search for food. I am a very picky eater, as in I like really plain and typical foods. Nothing ethnic, and when in doubt a chain is always good. One friend likes to eat at unique restaurants (or at least something we DONT have at home) and another was vegan. I quickly learned that it was ok to do things on my own, even if I was in an unfamiliar city. I have a good sense of direction, and when it doubt I could use the maps on my phone. I am usually the girl who will sacrifice what she wants to be part of the group (more so when I don’t have a strong opinion on the matter) but I learned its okay to do things on my own. Movie by myself? Maybe not, but baby steps… eating by myself.
Our final day of ‘camp’ I was given a rare chance to walk outside along the edge of the CN Tower. The CN tower is one of the Seven Wonders of the Modern World (along with the Itaipu Dam on the Brazil/Paraguay border, the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, the Panama Canal, the Chunnel under the English Channel, the North Sea Protection Works off the European coast, and the Empire State Building). It is also the worlds tallest free-standing structure at 1815 feet, 5 inches. The EdgeWalk is the Highest External Walk on a Building.
So I would be crazy to do it right? I am also the cheapest person in the world, so while everyone else was freaking out about the height, I was thrilled to not have to PAY to experience it. I figured if I came back with my family I would never spend the money to do it. Yes, I am that cheap person.
As we were preparing, the 6 of us were all discussing our thoughts and fears, making jokes about our tickets going into our sleeves to identify our bodies. I can tell you, this was a truly amazing experience. I was asked to step toward the edge of a metal cliff thousands of feel off the ground and set my toes over the edge. One foot jumped quickly, but sliding the second I had a slight hesitation. The group of strong women support me, there is no way they will allow me to chicken out. The though that I might be insane passes through my mind. I soon learn to trust the equipment so that I can be present in the moment. I step over the ledge, leaning forward and looking across Toronto and stop to feel the peace and beauty that surrounds me. Its quiet.
I am so glad that Dee gave us the advise to just trust in the equipment (TRUST would become our mantra) and I can honestly say I was 100% present in that moment. Its an amazing experience to look over the world and put things into perspective. I am so proud of myself and all the other women who participated in this event with me.